The holiday season brings twinkling lights and festive cheer. It also often brings together family and friends who may not see each other frequently. While this can lead to joyful reunions, it can also lead to disagreements and heightened emotions. As you gather this season, there are three things you can do to help maintain open, respectful communication and effectively navigate any conflicts that might arise:
- Listen more than you speak. Rather than focusing on getting your own point across, make an effort to truly hear what the other person is saying. Seek first to understand, then to be understood. Reflect back what you hear them saying to ensure you fully grasp their perspective before responding.
- Ask clarifying questions. If you feel yourself getting upset or confused, politely ask a clarifying question rather than making assumptions. Getting more information can help prevent unnecessary conflicts. For example, “I want to make sure I fully understand. Could you tell me more about…”
- Find common ground. Even in the midst of disagreement, look for shared hopes, values, or experiences. Identify common ground you can connect on and affirm your shared interests in maintaining a caring relationship. You likely have more in common than you might think.
During this holiday season, bring people together in peace and understanding. Focusing on mindful communication and conflict management will help make that possible.
By: Elizabeth Hill, Associate Director, University of Colorado Boulder Ombuds Office and co-editor of Ombuzz